Jersey Shore Parody

This video is genius!! When you mix the beach with Springsteen AND the cast of the Jersey Shore peeps.. you have GENIUS!!

I am just pissed that I didnt get on the show since I have been fist pumping in the shore night clubs since 1979.

Dont the kids of the Jersey Shore need a den mother or something?? Where do I sign up!!




I Die

Betty White and Tracy Morgan - The Latest In Cougar Town

If you cant get enough of either Betty White OR Tracy Morgan, check out this little diddy that memorializes their new relationship hidden by a photo shoot.

I say we campaign to see these two get married.. Face Book anyone??



I Die!

Saturday Night Live - Lord Douchebags!!

Omg.. A blast from the past..



LMAOO

Saturday Night Live Weekend Update

Ok, Some of you know that I have been sporting a really bad muscle pull or something and I cant harldy walk let alone get up out of a chair.  Sleeping has been rough as well.

Last night I forgot to DVR SNL and just started watching online.  Weekend Update is my favorite skit and they have a new character.  He is a Stefon who is a new (gay) correspondent which is becoming a huge favorite.

The best part is watching Seth Meyers try and keep his composure during the entire skit. 

The second half of the update is with 2 characters Garth and Kat.  If you have never seen this skit before, let me fill you in on the story line.  They are a couple who oozes sunshine out of their asses and pretend to be singer/song writers.  They are ALWAYS unprepared and just make shit up.  Kristin Wig who I FLOVE is hysterical in this.  When they break out in song, she just stares at her husbands lips to try and pick up on the lyrics he is making up and is geniously 3 seconds behind him and immitating his hand moves.

I laughed so friggin hard that I was coughing and wheezing and now my side hurts so bad, I cant move.

I am supposed to entertain in a few hours and now I am dead meat. 

Please keep the phone handy in case you need to dial 911 while watching..

Part 1:
Update.. SNL had seperated the skit and a new link.. sorry peeps.. here it is and enjoy Stefan!!


Part 2



I DIE!!!!

Amazing Gorilla Reunion

I know I know!!!  Haven't posted in a while.  Lost my taste of shnark as of lately since my allerigies are killing me.. Yes killin me like sleeping all day and doped up on vino..    A girl gotta medicate herself.. Ya know?

Anywho..  this is not a shnarky post.  This is one of those spingly tear jerkers of a video that makes you go aweeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee  and wish you could experience this love with a huge hairy beast.  Oh wait!! I did have one of those kinds of love with my ex!!   BAZINGA!!!!
 
This video is about some dude who supports the Aspinall Foundation which is a charity that promotes wildlife conservation and reintroduces captive gorillas back into the wild in West Africa. Five years ago, conservationist Damian Aspinall (a gift from baby Jesus) released a gorilla, Kwibi, into the jungles of Gabon. Aspinall returned recently to reunite with a now ten-year-old Kwibi.

Now, I live in the Tri State area and have seen countless reports on the Chimp that unmercifully mangled a woman beyond recognition and thought this video might have a not so happy ending that I started to bite my nails and get queasy. 

Ch Ch Check out this Video and watch the gorillas eyes..  I get weepy just thinking about it..



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Gargamel!!! Where have you been!!

Look at Hank Zarin below doing a great Gargamel like no one has!!!  He is perfect!!!  My kids would be proud.  What a great haeinus turd that he is with all the yuck in  life.. 

I just love him and all his madness.  I cant wait to see what evil he will zap on our blue good peeps..

I'm Just saying..

Doña Maria del Rosario Cayetana Alfonsa Victoria Eugenia Francisca Fitz-James Stuart y Silv!

Doña Maria is the current reigning Duchess of Alba and head of the House of Alba

I want to throw up a little bit and now think I look so gooood!!

I think if I had a ton of money.. the last thing I would do is plump up my lips and intentionally get frizzy hair products.. Let copulate that with a white veil and have a coke ring ontop of top lip..  Thats not "Let Get Milk" peeps..  stop thinking she is lapping up the midwife...

Ahhh.. good ol times when I was younger but didnt look like this.. even thou I was a queen in my own mind.  I had coke parties and lots of mirrored tables for all to cut on.  I was the queen of stash up you noses.  So peeps who where not invited knew they were passe of not that cool..

Sigh.. I am dating myself and now need a line..     OF A NEW DIALOGUE HERE!!

You peeps are just drug infested.. I tell ya...

I'm just saying..

P.S.  Drugs kill and I am just kidding..  If you want to have a life of sucking gum off streets and begging for burnt popcorn.. suck up the white horse you turds... life is better eating bonbons and watching soap operas you turds..

Holy CraP...

Iggy Pop is Zexzy

Holy crap.. someone tell this guy to put a shirt on..  I am feeling my face fall down and my Vadge fall into my ankles..

It aint right!!!

I'm just saying...

A Fart Blanket For The Couple

This is the best thing ever invented!!! We know of "Dutch Ovens" which my daughter had to explain to me and was aghast!!

I had no clue there was a reference to laying fanny burps under the covers and putting the covers over your partners head and having a fit of laughter to top the cherry off!! Thanks Erica and Bill!!!

Now I want to throw up..

When I am a bit gassy, I prefer to tuck the blankets all around me and just pretend that nothing is going on.

Until one night...

I had a really bad time with something I ate.  I have no idea what it was, but Mr Man always tells me that something is rotten in Denmark. 

I get his meaning..

Soo......  I was letting them loose one night and made sure my high falutin quilt was tucked all round me body and would worry about airing it out the next day...

I was watching TV and it was late, and he wanted to go to sleep and I just yelled. to just let me finish my show!!!

So he just looked at me and decided he was not going to win this fight. 

He just decided to take the covers over his head to block out the light from the TV and I inhaled deeply..

HOLY CHIT!!!

He jumped out of the bed and screamed at me!!!  Ran out of the room and got the friggin lysol..

I ran out of the room since that stuff makes my lungs squeeze tightly and he was yelling like a banshee..

I could not stop laughing and coughing and spitting due to his indignat behavior which gave me more pleasure..

Needless to say.. I have been waiting to tell this story which then at this point my daughter and her husband told me that I was doing a "Dutch Oven"   

I cannot tell you how much this gave me pleasure in knowing that I did something inknowingly that is a total recent fad.  I am cool. 

Whatch this video for peeps like me who needs to invest..  or not??  I prefer the outrage...

I'm just saying...

First Look At Marmaduke

Krike!! Is this Marmaduke who is having a bad year????

I am worried about this guy. some peeps who are too old to know we are not quite waiting for this.. We would rather have more funny than a sitcom or something else.. I want Marmaduke too jump on tables. slobber the folks and eat the Thanksgiving dinner.. This may not be a hit but it is a flashback from the past..

You younging might not know who he is so google his cartoon slides.. Its a favorite newspaper cartoon from my youngin days..

Man that was so long ago...

I feel like scooby doo on a bad night..

YIKES!!!

Drunk Man Tries To Resuscitate a Dead Possum?

http://online.wsj.com/article/SB10001424052748704266504575142224096848264.html?mod=WSJ_WSJ_US_News_3  

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2010/03/26/drunk-man-arrested-for-tr_n_515276.html

Police say they charged a Pennsylvania man with public drunkenness after he was seen trying to resuscitate a dead opossum along a highway.

State police in Punxsutawney say several witnesses saw 55-year-old Donald Wolfe, of Brookville, near the animal Thursday afternoon. Police arrested him along the highway, Route 36, in Oliver Township, about 65 miles northeast of Pittsburgh.

The Associated Press could not locate a home telephone number for Wolfe.

A state police news release did not specify how Wolfe was allegedly trying to revive the roadkill. The arresting trooper did not immediately return calls for comment Friday.

Read more: http://www.nypost.com/p/news/national/drunk_pa_man_tried_to_revive_dead_fYRQF5TfpUHx5JbseDlmEL#ixzz0jOnX03Oe

I'm Just Saying...

Burger Brawl At Whataburger

Who goes to a burger joint and expect this kind of entertainment??

If a Man doesnt get his burger.. watch out!!!

Lord have mercy!!  yeah yeah.. I say that all the time but I do have recollections of my man throwing plates of cold spaghetti through my small kitchen window staining my window curtains since he came home late from the bars.. and yes.. it was cold.. 

Men are cold and hot...

Hot.. let me strip for you and give you a lap dance..  He was hot.. but no.. I would not give him that..

Cold..  you came home late for dinner.. you could of heated up dinna... I still didnt give him that dance.

KILL ME NOW!!

This turd below is an example of my life..





I'm Just Saying...

Dog Gets Sprung From The Joint!!!

Poor wee lad Winston the dog has finally been sprung from jail since he chewed off the bumper from a PO-lice VE-hicle. It is said that this is not his normal behavior which got him sprung from the Doggy Jail in time to get home to get some lovin and rubbin from his owners.. Maybe a pork rind as a treat?

Now.. I do think there is a conspiracy theory here. I think the poor wee lad Winston smelled bacon.. Yep.. I said it.. He smelled bacon and went WILD on that cruiser to put a cap in his ass. I think someone set the poor lassie up and taintied that car with pork grease and he couldnt contain himself. Its not that poor dogs faults since how would he get his hands on pork grease!!




I'm Just Saying..

Genius Bank Robbers

Genius bank robbers call the bank ahead of time to let the bank know they are going to rob their asses and to get the loot ready..

Lord have mercy!! If I only knew it was that easy!! I would be rich.. with a million dollars, a mansion and a yacht!!!

Bugs Bunny.. how could I been so stupid...



I'm Just saying..

Jamie Olivers Food Revolution

Has anyone else been watching Jamie Olivers "Food Revolution"?

I really think this is a fantastic show and the county that he is revolting against totally needs his help.

Poor Jamie is trying to demonstrate to the kids and adults the processed food and how they are made.  He takes the chicken bones and guts.. puts them in a food processor puts them in a siv, mashes them up and adds crumbs and seasoning..  THis whole time he demonstrates the yuckyness that you would think kids would not want to touch...

Well he was wrong.. the friggin wee babies still wanted the food.

What the hell are we teaching kids to put in our mouths???  Its not the kids.. its the parents.. 

No wonder sex is on the rise with kids.    Peeps promote all kind of bad stuff..




THis is what processed chicken looks like in a factory when done mashing up all the bits that only dogs eat..

I'm Just Saying...

Guys Fight In Public Aid Office

Holy Cat Fight!!!!!

These dudes at a public aid office is totally out of control and I freakin love it!!!

The one dude in the purple has some mean right hooks then stomps around to find some more of who wants a peice of him... them he breaks out in a dance.. and eventually does the bow to the crowds... lord it got my blood pressure up and had to reach for my pills to keep me from having a coronary..

Hey may bow out like a lady.. but he fights like a guy!!

I am cornfused!!!!




I'm just saying..

Sheep Pig?

Who decided that a pig rolling around in its own chit deserves to have wool on its back? 

Someone decided to get a sheep and a pig to do the nasty and make beautiful music together with the fiddles of "Deliverance's" "Dueling Banjoes" while the pig was tied to a tree, squeeling while the sheep was making his way with her.  Ahh.. the good ol days of "Deliverance" with no teef backwards sheeps who were inbred and ruling the forest to the likes of Burt Reynolds, John Voight and Warren Beatty..   Again..  the twang.. of Dueling Banjo's ring in my head unmercilessly and gives me the uneasy feeling that I have to lie flat on my back to protect myself!!



I'm Just Saying...

Drunk Dude at Coachella

For some reason, I totally identify with this guy!!  I think he is my long lost fraternal twin who did not share with me or even take me to this event.  I am secretly pissed at him for bogarting!!!

Look at this dude have a "situation" with his flip flops..  I mean.. well.. it makes him flip flop all over the place to carefully slide his feet into the flip flops but unfortunately, he sees 3 of each.  If I was there I would of helped him on with his shoes and stole his backback cause you know.. there is great contraband in there..



I'm just saying..

Free Hugs Vs 2$ Deluxe Hugs!! You Choose!

There has been many a day when I was feeling so low that I could easily chew the gum off me shoe without even contorting myself into a pretzel to do so. Sometimes I feel no one loves me and feel like a leper that even my own granchildren wont even throw me a fricken bone!! I have to douse myself in gallons of vino just to take the sting out of feeling neglected, unwanted and just plain unloved...

There is also many a days where I want to be invisible and demand no one speaks to me as not to hear;

Mom!! wheres the ketchup,

Mom!! Do I have clean underwear..

Mom!!! Whats to eat..

MOM!!! He's bothering me... wahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

So I cant decide if I want a hug or not, but if you THINK you want one, get some love below in the video and if your really hard up for cash, this is a new idea to raise money and sucking the bucks outta peeps who are lonely and desperate.....



I'm Just Saying..

Happy Ending Massage?

I remember when I was a youngin and guys talking about happy endings at the local massage parlour and me thinking you were getting a big dollop of cotton candy or a lovely crystallized red candy covered apple. OH WAIT!! As a kid we had a huge stand up freezer in the garage and we would get out the cookie sheet, plop down the dixie cups, stick in the spoons and pour in the Cherry Kool-Aid and just wait!!! The bottom of the cups had like an italian ice gushy frozy type of matter on the bottom and that was always MY happy ending to Kool Aid POP!

Ok I digress, again.. here is a happy ending that is not happy for some but in my book can be enjoyed with that Kool Aid pop while munching on the bottom of that Happy Ending Pop..

Facts On Farts.. An Education For You Turds

Source: Online Education

The Gay Leprechaun Returns!!

The Gay Leprechaun has striked again! If you havent seen the first installment.. click here.. I am sure this in one of my lost long cousins.. from some other planet.. but If he brings you ambien.. DONT TAKE IT!!!! RUN!! DONT WALK AND STAY AWAY FROM THE BATH HOUSES!!!

I'm just saying..



A Yackaatateee A Yackaateetoo....Kick your feet up peeps and sing the leprechaun song!!! A Yackaatateee A Yackaateetoo....

The Gay Leprechaun

As the Luck of the Irish would have it, We have a wee video of the Gay Leprechaun for our grand viewing pleasure!!   His dances are adorable, mesmorizing and just plain out makes all the lass's and lads of the world want to get up and dance!

SNL Saturday Night Live 3/13/2010 Hosted by Jude Law

I already posted the hysterical digital short below with Andy Samberg below and have to share a few more clips from the show last night.

If you dont watch the view and picking apart Whoopie Goldberg, than you may not get the following clip. I love how she is always portrayed as the know it all and if she doesnt know the answers.. she just says.. "You dont know.. you werent there.." etc. Her eye bugging out trying to speak to the masses with her looks are getting really old. I wish when she was bugging out her eyes that someone would slap her on the back of the head so they pop out and put her out of business. Or maybe she can place an eyeball at far sides of the country so she can be all knowing and seeing.. sigh.. she is getting on my nerves.



Orrr... if you are a ol game show junky of the old days and remember password, SNL has a rendition called secret word. Unfortunately, the word is not so secret.



Any my favorite next to the Andy Sambergs video below.. is an episode of "Really" With Seth and Jerry Seinfeld talking about Eric Massa and his groping/fondling,massaging, and diving for gold.. REALLY??



Well... thats all folks!!!!!!!

Andy Samberg Digital Short, Boombox (Can Save The World)

The video for Boombox is here! From The Lonely Island's debut album "INCREDIBAD"

 The Lonely Island is Andy Samberg, Akiva Schaffer & Jorma Taccone performing a fantastic video premiered on SNL last night and I predict this will go viral!!  If not give you a viral infection from watching this video.  I kid you not!  I am already getting itchy in the girly bits and have a visable rash.

If you don't like funny, side aching video's coupled with a great chorus, then dont click play. 

I warned you!!



Genius!!!   I nominate this song for a musical pultizer prize!!!  WHO'S WIT ME???